Why am I feeling this way?

How you may be feeling

Since the Queen died, there has been large scale expression of ‘social grief.' You, or others around you, may question these feelings as “you didn’t even have a close relationship to the Queen” or, “you’ve never even met her”…. However, please be assured that it is completely normal to have such a strong emotional response when something of this significance happens.    

Some people who have reached out for support, tell us that "it feels like it did when I lost my Grandmother"  and whilst it is different, we need to recognise that the Queen did in fact play a key role in so many of our lives. When you stop and think about it, she was present in our key celebrations such as Christmas Day and was the prominent figure who would offer words of comfort and support in the aftermath of tragedies. Her death comes quickly on the heels of the whole nation celebrating her Platinum Jubilee, whether or not a supporter of the royal family- she has been a constant in all our lives.

What you can do to help

Across this mourning period of our Monarch, there are some things you can do to help

• You may wish to acknowledge your grief and pay your respects by visiting the Palace of Holyrood in Edinburgh, Buckingham Palace or a local memorial spot close to where you live.
• Leave a message via one of the online books of condolence to give thanks to the Queen and offer your sympathies to the royal family.
• You may wish to do something creative, particularly if including children or those with a learning disability and create your own remembrance book of your favourite memories and pictures of the Queen.
• Take time out from TV, radio and social media to have a break from the constant coverage.   When a significant event happens, media can be overwhelming, take a break from it for a while.
• Speak to someone. Talk with your friends or family about how you are feeling, you could be surprised that they are experiencing this too. If you don’t have someone you can talk with, you can call Cruse Scotland and speak to one of our helpline team.  We understand.

The Cruse Scotland free phone helpline, 0808 802 6161, is open Mon-Fri 9am-8pm and Sat & Sun 10am-2pm for those who need additional support to cope with their grief. Our Webchat facility is available 9am-9pm Mon-Fri on this site.

Read our related blog: A nation mourns, by Nicola Reed, Cruse Scotland's Head of Client Services explains.